Digging through the junk in my own trunk

Today I received the gift of an Intermountain Healthcare trunk organizer. Evidently despite all of my efforts to the contrary, someone has managed to catch a glimpse of the junk in my trunk.

The aforementioned "organizer" was cleverly packaged to conceal 2 very burlapy looking re-usable grocery bags. While I usually appreciate the gift within a gift concept; I find the fact that I now own re-usable grocery bags to be fundamentally disturbing. To be perfectly honest, I am unable to feel anything but contempt for the re-usable grocery bag. People who have deep and passionate feelings about environmental issues are probably rending their woven hemp headbands over this admission, but - there you go.

Having a brief past in the grocery business I have a little experience with the re-usable grocery bag. I attribute most of my dislike for them with the fact that they generally look like their owner doubles them as a rag for wiping down the grosser parts of public restrooms. Honestly, I'm willing to grant that I don't save the environment very often; but at least I also don't haul my food inside something that smells like it's fabric was reclaimed from a shifty old couch from good will. I can barely bring myself to put my hand in there and they want to eat stuff that was carried in it?



It doesn't help that most people who use these bags consider them a friggin badge of honor. They go as far as to conceal them until after their bagger asks if they want paper of plastic bags. Then with a self-important smile they say "neither" and toss a couple of those creepy cloth things at you.
Not to mention that they also believe that the bags have magical powers. They expect you to fit an entire basket full of groceries into 2 bags. Supposedly they can carry 600lbs of food each because they're "cloth".

Ugh, this whole thing has dredged up all sorts of adolescent anger... I need a snack.